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This is a guest post by was provided by Sam Burgoon and the great folks over at Pocket Savvy.
It’s safe to say that pretty much every couple, regardless of its financial statues, argues about money. Usually one is stingy while the other is a spendthrift, but that is too much of a black/white description of a relationship’s money issues.
So let’s delve a little bit deeper, shall we?
Lying About Finances
Lying about anything is bad enough, and finances are not the exception. Financial deception often leads to arguments and mistrust. Signs that your partner is lying when talking about money include changing the topic, becoming defensive, insisting on managing finances by themselves, lying to others about money, coming from a family with money issues of their own, sudden changes in behavior, among others. Also, and as they say, once a thief, always a thief, meaning that if they’ve done it before, chances are they are doing it again.
Being In Debt
If we played devil’s advocate for a while we could say that it is somewhat understandable that some people, men in particular, would feel the need to lie about their finances, for instance about being in debt, especially when up to 70 percent of women say they would leave a partner who is deep in debt, or is otherwise insolvent. Men seem to be more tolerable, as only 37 percent would end a relationship for those same reasons. Moreover, when the debt-ridden party doesn’t take any action towards fixing their financial status only makes matter worse.
Why is that last statement so? Because if one of the two is in a precarious economic situation, and that doesn’t seem to bother them, it’s most likely because they are leeching off the other, such as using their credit cards, letting them pay for everything, constantly borrowing money from them, all of which are practices that they probably subject the rest of their friends and family to as well, not just their significant-others
Once again, in these times of recession it is understandable that many people are stuck in an unemployment limbo. Nevertheless, there are many other employed fish in the sea, and someone who is continually without a job might be ‘fired’ from a relationship too, as it were. It doesn’t help if their treating unemployment as a sort of permanent vacation, and repeating the patterns mentioned in the previous paragraph. Now, if they at least get out there and look for something, or occupy their time in a worthwhile endeavor, then that might help them in their cause.
Maybe your love interest has a spotless record; no debt, no bad credit, and has an honest job with decent pay but will they remain always that way? You can observe their current conduct and get an idea of what the future could be like. Do they save for retirement, or for an emergency? Are they too liberal with money? Do they live from check to check? No one knows what will happen tomorrow, but of your partner doesn’t even care, then it might best to remove yourself from the relationship before it’s too late.
Pocket Savvy is a personal finance website, featuring with money-saving tips and financial resources aimed to help you improve your money management skills. Follow Pocket Savvy on Twitter, and connect on Google+ and Facebook.
All the things you have discussed here are really so important and should be noted.
Very informative post. Yeah, even my husband and I most likely argues about money. In my experience, it's far better to open up with your partner the potential red flags as early as possible before getting the situation worse. For instance, there are certain red flags that you should be aware of when getting into a relationship.
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